I post a lot of thoughts on Facebook and eventually started calling some of my longer posts “short stories” or “op eds” even though I assumed most people would keep scrolling and never read them. Of course as a storyteller, I tend to be long-winded and have not mastered the gift of brevity in the social media world. See, here I go again with a long intro to what I came here to blog about today.
So anyway, this memory popped up on my personal Facebook page yesterday from a year ago. (I have a separate author page on Facebook here.) I shared the memory on Facebook but decided to also make it a new blog entry to share with y’all today. When I first saw the memory, I almost kept scrolling without reading it, but then slowed down and read the whole thing again as well as ALL the original 76 comments. I had written it initially a couple of weeks after George Floyd’s murder in 2020. As I reflected on so much that has happened since the protests started after his death and ultimately the conviction of the police officer who murdered him, I wondered how much our society has really changed over the past year. If nothing else, it appears that sensible people at least admit there is a systemic issue that needs to be reconciled while those who don’t see “what the big deal is” and deny that racism exists in America still seem to be living in a strange alternate reality based on fiction and denial.
With that being said, I copied my entire Facebook short story below along with this picture from the original post. Most of my Facebook friends are accustomed to me plastering pictures of my husband, William, all over my personal page. I love shouting from the rooftop how much I love this man that God blessed me with. He is the topic of many of my social media posts, and so it is today as I share these reflections with all of you about this #BlackMan that I married. (For more info about him and how we met, check out my first blog post entry: Boy Meets Girl) You have to know my backstory to understand why I call this blog and my first book LIVING INSIDE THE TESTIMONY. I hope that by sharing my reflections on what was on my mind a couple of weeks after George Floyd’s murder will make you pause and think. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below.
This little boy is William. His face greets me every time I open my jewelry box and makes me smile. Today he made me think about all the other little black boys in America, so that’s why I chose to post the other pictures to tell my story.
The top left is our 9th grade homecoming. He was 15. Had William been Emmett Till, who was savagely lynched at age 14, I would be standing there with someone else because William would have been the innocent victim of a barbaric murder at the hands of 2 white men during the 1950’s Jim Crow Era.
The bottom left is our 10-year high school reunion. Trayvon Martin was still in high school when a white vigilante murdered him. He never graduated, let alone attended any of his high school reunions.
The top middle is from our 30th wedding anniversary in Hawaii. I could have been like the widow of Eric Garner who was murdered before they celebrated their 30th anniversary.
The top right is our 30-year high school reunion. George Floyd graduated from high school 28 years ago. If William was George, he would have been senselessly murdered before he could attend that class reunion with me.
When people look at MY HUSBAND, some may feel threatened. After all, he’s a big, black man and unfortunately that’s all some people see. That breaks my heart because I know the heart of THIS MAN, and he’s not a threat to anyone. In his big strong arms is where I feel the safest and most loved! Y’all know I plaster pictures of my “love man” all over my Facebook page. When you look at us, what do you see?
When you look at my current cover picture, what do you see? Those are pictures from our firstborn’s wedding 3 months ago. He married the love of his life after dating since they were 17. She just happens to be white, and I could not have handpicked a better wife for my son. I truly believe God ordained their marriage before they were born.
William has been racially profiled. He’s been stopped by police for no reason and felt threatened and humiliated. We’ve had conversations with our 2 sons. You know the ones: “If you are ever stopped by the police for any reason or no reason at all, do this…” (in order to try to stay alive) Those are painful but necessary conversations.
Another reason I included those high school reunion pictures is to make a point about having the “privilege” of going to predominantly white schools. William and I were born in the segregated south. Our school system desegregated when I started kindergarten. Had Dr. King and the Civil Rights Movement not been successful, we never would have attended Bartlett High School, so those class reunions would be nonexistent. That also means the majority of my white friends would not be my friends because I never would have met them due to segregation. You see, white privilege really is a thing.
Systemic racial injustice is also a real thing. My intent is not to make you uncomfortable, but hopefully make you pause and consider race relations in America. We are all affected in some way, regardless of our color. If not, shame on you for not having a heart that cares for all people. It ALL matters!
We can’t take pictures like this for granted. There are so many innocent black people who haven’t lived long enough to do the same. (Yes, there are innocent white people killed and disenfranchised every day, but those numbers are minuscule compared to blacks.) Whether it’s the criminal or social (in)justice system or a white vigilante, it’s got to stop. I admire and respect our police officers (especially where I live in Bartlett), and I cannot imagine a world without them. We desperately need them, but those who think they can get away with murder and other injustices need to go.
I am very thankful for the life God has blessed me to live with THIS BLACK MAN in white suburbia! I’m godly proud of the 2 black men that we have raised! As they say, we really are living the American dream, but it’s only because of God’s grace and mercy. I love my black family and my white friends. I know that God created us all to be equal. Why some people feel they know more than God blows my mind.
#GodPleaseBlessAmerica!
Again, I hope that by sharing my reflections on what was on my mind a couple of weeks after George Floyd’s murder in 2020 will make you pause and think. I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below.